Your Team Doesn’t Need a Hero

I was coaching a VP of product — smart, driven, deeply committed to her team. Her direct reports loved working for her. Her "open door" policy was famous across the company.

There was just one problem.

Her open door had become an open funnel. Every decision — large, small, strategic, operational — flowed through her. Not because her team was incapable. Because she'd trained them, through hundreds of small moments, that her door was faster than figuring it out themselves.

She wasn't being controlling. She was being helpful. And that helpfulness was slowly suffocating her team.

This is the pattern most leaders miss: the line between support and suffocation isn't about your intent. It's about the impact. And the impact shows up in one question: does your involvement make this person bigger or smaller?

I call this the Add Value / Detract Value test. Before you weigh in on someone's work, ask yourself:

Am I adding value — giving them a perspective they couldn't reach on their own, connecting dots they can't see from their position?

Or am I detracting value — inserting myself because it's faster, because it makes me feel useful, because I don't fully trust them to get there?

When you consistently insert yourself, you're sending a message: I don't think you can do this without me. Even if you'd never say that out loud, your behavior says it for you. Your team internalizes it. They stop taking risks. They start checking with you before acting. And eventually, every decision flows through you.

If every decision flows through you, you don't have a team. You have a line outside your office.

When I shared the Add Value / Detract Value framework with this VP, something shifted. She started catching herself mid-reach. She'd feel the pull to jump in and instead ask: "Will this make them bigger?" Most of the time, the honest answer was no.

Within two months, her team was making decisions she never would have trusted them with before. Not because they suddenly got better. Because she finally got out of the way.

Here's the hard truth: the leader who needs to be needed is the leader who's holding the team back. Your job isn't to have all the answers. It's to build people who can find the answers without you.

This week, notice how many times you insert yourself into your team's work. Then ask: am I adding value, or am I just making myself feel needed?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WruYFnG76w