INSIGHTS FOR GROWTH

Leaders who get trusted with more aren’t the ones who never have problems. They’re the ones who never let problems become surprises.

A senior leader was about to launch a political campaign against a peer based entirely on a narrative. Her facts were three items. Her assumptions filled a page. Here’s the five-minute exercise that changed everything.

When we’re in an emotional reaction, we’re not doing analysis. We’re doing prosecution. Collecting evidence, connecting dots — it feels thorough. But it’s confirmation bias with a suit on.

She’d spent her career in direct, transparent cultures. Then she moved to a company where people agreed in the meeting and disagreed in the hallway. Her lens was calibrated for the wrong environment — and she was missing every signal.

The single most useful question in thirty years of coaching. When things aren’t working, don’t argue about intent. Ask what changed. The answer is almost always more interesting than the complaint.

Take any situation that feels charged. Draw three columns: facts, assumptions, emotions. Most people find their assumptions column is three times longer than their facts column. That’s the gap where bad decisions live.

Questions. We’re trained to have answers. In school, at work, in life — the reward goes to the person with the solution. But here’s a pattern I keep seeing: the leaders who get stuck most often aren’t the ones who lack answers. They’re the ones who stopped asking questions. The quality of your leadership depends on the quality of your questions. A good question opens a door. It invites thinking instead of defending. It reveals the pattern hiding underneath the first response.

Hearing is passive. It happens automatically. Listening is active. It's a choice. And most of us aren't doing it nearly as well as we think.

Listening. It sounds simple. But most of us aren't doing it. Most people listen to respond, not to understand. While someone is talking, we're already formulating our reply. Planning our counterpoint. Waiting for our turn. Real listening is different. It's quieting your own thoughts. Letting go of your agenda. Becoming genuinely curious about what the other person means — not just what they're saying. It's rare. And people notice when you do it. What would change if you liste